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About Me

Hi! I’m Morry Kolman. I grew up in New York City, went to Williams College for undergrad, and returned to the city to do freelance work, write, and make art. Well, that’s not true. I returned to the city because I got a job at an advertising agency there. I quit that to work in political communications. Then I quit that to work on my own personal projects, apply to grad school, and see what I could make for myself. That’s where I am now :)

This portfolio is a smattering of things I’ve been working on over the past few years. Some of it has been for a paycheck, so of it has been for my own entertainment, and some of it just kinda happened. If there’s any through-line to all of this work, it’s that they’re all different attempts to see what I can make happen on the internet.

PS: If you’re wondering where the moniker WTTDOTM comes from, it’s the acronym for my first big meme page back in college, “Welcome To The Desert Of The Meme.”

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You: Lemme get uhhhhh...

Me when I see my memes

Other people when they see my memes

🤝
god damn I gotta post this everywhere

PLZ CTRL/CMD+CLICK ON IMAGE

TO OPEN HQ VERSION IN NEW TAB

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These are the two most important timers in my life.


This timer is how long I've been alive.
My secondary goal in life is to maximize its duration.

    This timer is how long I've been alive minus how long people have watched my content.
    My primary goal in life is to make its value reach zero.

      One day, I will have taken from the world an equal or greater amount of productivity than I have given it.

      I am halfway there.

      At the start of the pandemic, I picked up TikTok as a hobby. It was mainly a challenge to myself to see if I could build a TikTok following as I had built meme page followings before.
      With 45,000 followers, 4,000,000 likes, and over 15,000,000+ views, it seems like the answer is yes. Check out my profile here or enjoy some selected content + commentary below.

      Performance Data:

      3,500,000 Views
      545,300 Likes
      45,200 Shares
      39,901 Hours Watched

      Creative Process:

      I'm a huge fan of Genius' Check The Rhyme video series, but I wanted to use the idea of dynamic underlining for another purpose: dunking on Trump. I wish TikTok had opened the 1 minute limit to 3 earlier because there was so much more to this speech, but for how much time it took to edit, it's probably for the best. For each topic covered, I had to create and animate their respective underlines, adjusting keyframes for the speed of different parts of his speech. It meant an evening of tedious, repetitive work given up to the After Effects gods, but my effort was returned in spades.

      Performance Data:

      1,200,000 Views
      255,600 Likes
      2,724 Shares
      3,736 Hours Watched

      Creative Process:

      I had this idea at 3am when I couldn't sleep and the "leaving the door open" TikTok audio kept looping in my head. It ends with "A CHILD!" which is the same way an iconic vine ends. With this in mind, the next day I downloaded one of the TikToks using the original audio as well as screen recorded the last part of the old vine, edited them together on my phone, and uploaded them as a private video so I could use the sound for a real cut. I thought the use of FaceZoom was pretty appropriate and the final shot of "a child!" mirrors the original source video to seal the deal.

      Performance Data:

      1,200,000 Views
      122,300 Likes
      559 Shares
      7,017 Hours Watched

      Creative Process:

      My views were down, none of my videos had hit 10k in like two weeks, so I did what any content creator worth their salt would do: shill. I don't like it, but it's an easy recipe. Take some mildly universal experience (in this instance, the universe was NYC and the experience was holding a metrocard) and ask people what they think about it. Give them a new vocabulary to use to express themselves in the comments (outer pop, basic spin) and watch the comments roll in. Worked like a charm until 1.2% of people said they shove it up their ass. I'm not joking, check the comments, 21 out of 1781. TikTok, man.

      When I am not making consumable content, I like to poke holes in platforms and make silly little websites.

      Clicking the links will bring you to that project's portfolio page.

      What do you want to do?ProjectStatus
      Talk directly to advertisers scraping your dataDeface Your DataLive
      Watch a full-length movie on TikTokThe Little Tok of HorrorsRemoved
      Check if your IP address has 69 in itdoesmyipaddresshave69init.comLive
      Change Facebook's idea of who you areForget Me FacebookBeta
      Funge a tokenSuper Fungible TokenAlpha

      Deface Your Data

      Deface Your Data is a Chrome extension that captures URL requests before they leave the browser and dynamically replaces any data found in UTMs or other advertiser-based URL parameters with a custom message set by the user. Because these parameters are meant to hold any text string the advertiser sets, they get scraped directly into marketing dashboards without filtering, allowing the user's message to be displayed directly to the people snooping on their data for profit.

      Link

      Forget Me Facebook

      Forget Me Facebook is a website that allows users to obfuscate the consumer profile Facebook has on them by throwing junk data into it at scale. It capitalizes on the fact that Facebook's tracking pixel script must be run by the user's own browser to scrape over 100 different trackers from websites and put them all onto a single page. Users can choose from specific groupings of trackers to simulate a new consumer type, or trigger them all at the same time to send a blast of pure noise.

      Beta Link

      The Little Tok of Horrors

      The Little Tok of Horrors was the first full-length movie ever uploaded to TikTok. It exploited an oversight in TikTok's desktop video upload feature that only enforced its 60 second length requirement by checking the video file's metadata for its duration value. By editing the resolution and bitrate of the public domain film The Little Shop of Horrors to match file size and resolution requirements and then editing the hex of the duration value with that of a <60s video, I was able to upload the movie in full. The point was to illustrate how TikTok, the fastest growing video platform, does not actually watch any of its own videos, it merely computationally processes them. This point was proven twice, further reading is available on the Little Tok of Horrors project page on my website.

      DoesMyIPAddressHave69InIt.com

      Does what you think it does.

      Link

      Super Fungible Token

      Super Fungible Token is a website under active development that is intended to allow users to change the content of the NFT it hosts. The NFT's URI points to the sft.png file hosted and displayed on the site. Whenever a user submits an image to the content library, a script selects a random approved image from the library and copies it into the sft.png file. Contributing to the project funges to the token and adds to the possibilities it can display. Please note that in visiting you may find the site broken in different ways as I am still working on it.

      Alpha Link

      Mentions & Citations of Assorted Work

      Sometimes people decide I have done something worth hearing about or referencing. Here is a selection of some of those times:

      • Stolk, Lilian. Reclaiming Power. TheHmm, 2021. Link.

      • Van Den Brink, Laura. Enter The Memesphere. NextNature, 2021. Link.

      • Franceschi-Bicchierai, Lorenzo. Artist Tricks TikTok Into Hosting a 71 Minute-Long Video. Vice Media, 2021. Link.

      • Tennes, Carly. How Hackers Turned 'TikTok' Into An Underground Streaming Platform. Cracked, 2021. Link.

      • Lovasoa, Arielle. Un Artiste A Réussi À Publier Une Vidéo De 71 Minutes Sur TikTok. Fredzone, 2021. Link.

      • KultureGeek. Insolite: un artiste parvient à publier une vidéo de 71 minutes sur TikTok!, KultureGeek.fr, 2021. Link.

      • WPCC Editorial Board. Viral Culture, Memes in Society and Politics: An Interview with Anastasia Denisova. University of Westminster, 2020. Link.

      • Kracher, Veronika. Incels. Ventil Verlag, 2020. Link.

      • Lovink, Geert. Sad By Design. Pluto Press, 2019. Link.

      • Papadimatou, Anthi P. Fragile Beings: Nihilism and Existentialism in Modern Pop Creations. National and Kapodistrian University of Athens. 2018. Link.

      • Lovink, Geert & Tuters, Marc. They Say We Can't Meme: Politics of Idea Compression. 2018. Link.

      me and Tabby (I know its not a tabby, but that's his name), who lives down the street.

      > Oh no! The mobile experience of this portfolio is still under construction. Please come back on a desktop browser.

      > As an apology, here is a picture of me and a local bodega cat.

      > In the meantime, check out my website at the link below!

      Thanks for visiting!

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      Contact:

      If you like what you've seen, I'd love to hear from you! Use this form to send me a message, or hit me up on one of the links below :)